Gotta Love Drama
If there is something I find almost appalling in others, it is self-pity and nagging. I always see myself as the “come on, lets solve this problem” kind of person (basically I am a man). Wallowing is something I hate.. in others of course. Because, I myself must admit that in the past and especially…
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Alcohol has been on my mind a lot for the last year or more. It might even be about a year ago that I had my last drink. Funnily enough (super funny right..), I didn’t even choose not to. Out of the blue I was just too scared of the effects of alcohol to take a…
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The other day me and B. were braving strong gales in order to have a coffee in the sunshine. B. is probably my most “out there” friend who struggles through life by my side and has the uncanny ability to throw truths in my face when I am least ready to receive them. Pretty good…
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Almost a year ago I posted my first Blog. The idea to start writing again actually came from my sisters who thought that having an outlet for all my insanity might be good for me. In the beginning I hesitated of course, I mean, I am probably the trillionth mom to start a blog about…
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For some reason this is the hardest Blog I wrote for a long time. Not because it is a particularly difficult topic for me, or a very dramatic one but because I find it extremely hard to explain what happens to my muddled Self during Spring. Last year around this time I started this Blog…
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Warning up top: This Blog has become more negative then intended. Plus seriously, how often can the subject of Peanut Butter come up.. Apologies in advance. It happened, I wore out my Therapist! Or at least, she cannot help me anymore is what I am told. It is a strange story that is quite common…
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To say that my Life (yes with a capital L!) has been going through some changes in the past weeks or months is an understatement. It has been a regular whirlwind. Usually I survive these whirlwinds just fine. It is after the wind dies down that my personal turmoil begins. This is the kind of…
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Another weekend, another planning session on what activities to do with the Kid in full swing. You see, the Kid is a city dweller and does not have a garden to go crazy in. Like most parents in the city I need to take him out raging to get rid of some of the obnoxious…
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The mind is insane sometimes. I cannot speak for others, but my mind can make its own truths. Even when I know something did not happen or is not going to happen, my mind somehow does not accept that. It seems to run on two tracks. Track one: “nothing is wrong with that plate of…
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After hyperventilating myself through Christmas and hibernating through the lull before New Year’s Eve I actually dragged myself to a party for the happy occasion and promptly made it to bed at 00:05. I was there to see it happen though, 2018 is finally here! 2017 was quite a year, a year that kicked my…
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Of course I was aware, but after reading through my previous posts the other night I realised, again, that I am quite a negative person. Sarcasm, Irony, Cynicism, I’ve got them all down. It is positivity I have a hard time with. I mean, there is so much stuff in life that is damn annoying.…
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Today is the 1st of December. The jolliest month of the year has started and so has the nightmare of figuring out with whom and how to spend these days. Christmas is usually quite easy, you hop from friends to family to friends, eat too much, watch All you need is Love and eventually pass…
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Without any prompting from my therapist I decided last weekend to be uber-brave and go see a show in Utrecht. My friends are in the country and since I have avoided going to see them play for quite some time I thought I should just go for it. Anxiety be damned! I had the whole…
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They tell you a lot of things when you are pregnant. How breastfeeding is the best way to feed the baby, forgetting to tell you how incredibly painful it can be. How this is the most beautiful time of your life, while your relationship is slowly dying and you sit there, patiently listening, with bra…
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It is not easy to be the friend or partner of someone with an anxiety disorder. Relationships are hard at the best of times but if you are my friend or partner, chances are things get a bit crazy when I am at my best, and quite frustrating when I am at my worst. It…
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